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Archive for August, 2011

Fat People Smell

Notice the excessive sweat.

They really do.  Everybody knows it.  It’s no secret.  Yet when you try to voice this unspoken understanding, you’ll be pounced on by the fat apologists for being a bigot.  Lol WTF?  Are those idiots trying to tell me that reality is bigoted?

A lot of these same fat apologists who would force their bullshit on you will also try to deny the obvious reality that fat people fucking stink.  This is like trying to claim that 2 + 2 = 5.  The only way you could delude yourself into thinking this is true is by having your head so far up your ass that you close yourself off from the real world and live in a fantasy land inside your own head.  In other words, you are stupid.

But why do fatties stink?  There’s a myriad of reasons.  Let’s assume this hypothetical fatty is uptight about her hygiene, always pampering herself up and making sure she’s 100% clean.  She doesn’t stink more than somebody who weighs 100 pounds less, right?  Wrong.  Fatties sweat more than a person who not fat, which is the result of their excessive insulation from their fat as well as their fat rubbing against each other to create more friction.

Now, you might think that wearing deodorant, various creams, and showering multiple times a day solves that issue, and while it helps, it doesn’t do everything.  Sorry fatties, but you can’t take any shortcuts on this.  Fatties’ excessive sweat washes away deodorant and cream more quickly than a fit person.  Hell, a truly fit person doesn’t even need to wear any deodorant or creams and shower multiple times a day to smell just fine, yet a fatty would have to apply their shit and shower 3+ times a day just to smell passable.  Fucking passable, as in I’m not on the verge of vomiting by being within 10 feet of you.  And even then, you sweat all over your body and fatties are too fat to reach every area of their disgustingly huge bodies to wash and apply cream.

Of course, does a fatty who cares so much about their hygiene really exist?  There’s a reason why this scenario is presented in the hypothetical.  I’m not convinced that such a fatty exists.  You’d think somebody so concerned about their appearance would, well, not be fat!  You’d think somebody who’s so fucking obsessed about their appearance and hygiene would actually do something about their disgusting selves.  The fact that it’s safe to say none exist only underscores my point about fat people stinking even further.  Not only do you have fat people smelling more on their own, but they’re also a lot less inclined to shower regularly or even wear deodorant.  These animals are absolutely shameless.  Fucking sick.

This story below a friend E-mailed to me touches on this.  I gotta warn you though, visualizing it may make you lose your lunch:

My friend has one of the most DISTURBING, DISGUSTING pooping habits ever.

This kid I know weighs 450 pounds and is morbidly obese. I’m surprised he hasn’t died from it yet. He’s only 17. A few of my friends and I went over to his to keep him company since his parents were out of town. He wanted someone to play PS3 with him so we were happy to oblige.

Around 20 minutes into a game of Resistance, the kid goes “i’ll be right back, i gotta take a crap.” and walks off. I noticed he grabbed a large bucket, which I found strange. What happened next disgusted me beyond all reason.

From the bathroom, I heard a large roar, like a beast of some sort. I asked one of my friends who knows the fat kid a lot better than I do what was going on. His response still haunts me to this day:

“He takes a bucket to the bathroom with him because the smell always makes him puke. All the crusty shit and ass sweat caught in the folds of his fat have been decaying for months because he can’t clean himself. As soon as he drops his pants, the shit/sweat stench fills the bathroom and he begins throwing up.”

If this story hasn’t convinced you, nothing will.  All fat people smell like this.  There is no exception.  The world would have a much more pleasant scent without fatties stinking up the air.

Eugenics against fat people

4 August 2011 44 comments

Today I was at the movies, going to see the new planet of the apes movie. It wasn’t bad and when I was walking out I glanced over at a fat couple and noticed something that made my blood boil.
They were just sitting there, taking up the whole bench, a man and woman (4 or 5 normal sized people could have fit on it), holding a baby and feeding it from a bottle. “What’s wrong with that?” Well I’ll tell you what. When I looked at the bottle there was no milk in it, it was not a white liquid, they were pouring soda down their infant’s throat. That did it for me. An adult, sure, they can make the decision to smoke a cigarette, chop off their limbs, or do some other self-destructive shit to themselves. But a baby? An innocent little baby?
I walked over to them and confronted them. “What the fuck do you think you’re doing?” “Excuuuse me?” the hambeast replied, as if she was worthy of my presence. “What the FUCK are you feeding that baby?” “Umm, it’s none of your business GUY!” This really pissed me off because I think that torturing children and malnourishing them is everyone’s business because our tax money goes into their medical bills. And I make quite a bit of money, so even more of my tax money goes into it then most people. I could tell these people were dirt poor, their fashion sense was terrible, the man’s polo had two buttons missing and the woman had two different shoes on.

Poisoning our youth

So I did what any sensible, hard working, caring citizen would do. I took the bottle and I threw it across the theater lobby, gave them the death stare, and said “You get the fuck out of here you disgusting swine, and do not poison that child again.” I then proceeded to flex my pectorals and show off how beastly I was, as an intimidation tactic to make them get the fuck out. It worked, but I fear they’re probably shoving some MnM’s down that child’s throat right now. Either way, let me get to my point.
Fat people like this are the scum of the earth and not only hurt themselves, but everyone around them, especially their children. I cannot count the number of times fatties say “It just runs in my family” when it’s obvious that nobody has ever run in that family, since they’re all fat. There is no gene that makes you put on massive amounts of fat like that, and if there was it couldn’t possibly be as prevalent as obesity is now.
The problem is that fatties make their kids eat shitty food, and they pass on their shitty habits to the kids. And the cycle continues. The more fat people walking around, the more people that will see it as acceptable, and more people will allow themselves to get fat. This is why we should stop it at the source. We should sterilize fat people.
Nothing permanent, no, something that can be reversed if they put in the incredibly small amounts of effort necessary to be thin.
It may be a big step, but it can be done, and the results would be fantastic.
What are we waiting for, it’s not like fatties can have sex very well without the risk of dying from a heart attack or being crushed to death anyway…

Categories: Fat People, Stories

How hard is it really to not be a fatty

3 August 2011 4 comments

So I went to visit my friend at the beach today but I needed to go to the store. So I’m waiting in line at the checkout and some fat piece of shit walks up behind me. I turned around and looked at the monstrosity and rolled my eyes as I tried to hold back vomit. Fatty got the message of disapproval and said to me ‘Hey, you, mister!’
‘Yes?’ I replied. ‘You’re supposed to have a shirt on inside.’ Now this pissed me off, I’m literally a 10 minute walk from the beach and this piece of shit expects me to put a shirt on just so he doesn’t have to feel insecure about his jelly rolls? ‘Unlike you I don’t make people vomit when I take my shirt off.’ Fatty muttered something under his breath and shook his head like the little bitch he was. As I was walking out of the store he yelled to me ‘you know, not everyone is obsessed with looking good, some of us don’t have time for that crap’
I laughed it off at first and then I started to think about what he was talking about on the way back. What exactly was taking up all of his time that required him to eat massive amounts of food? I couldn’t think of anything, because he’s an idiot and doesn’t know anything.
You can be relatively sedentary, and with a good diet, never get fat. Of course you’ll look weak, but you won’t be fat, and you can achieve this by using my simple dietary guidelines.
Now why the hell are fat people so completely ignorant of the fact that good health literally takes negligible amounts of time from their day and money from their pockets?
A little exercise here and there isn’t too much to ask for, maybe an hour a week would be enough if you just wanted to have a slightly athletic body, and eating less food actually saves money. Water is probably the cheapest drink and it’s also the healthiest. Instead of scarfing down donuts eat a salad. You stick it in your mouth, chew it, and eat it. You do NOT have to go to the end of the earth just to eat a healthy meal. You don’t really have to go out of your way to eat healthy, and you feel better after eating a nice, healthy, nutrient-dense meal compared to shoving pizzas down your throat and washing your mouth with coca cola. Honestly, you fat fucks have probably not felt the fullness of nutrient satiety since you drank from your mom’s tits. There’s two types of fullness – where your stomach is literally full in volume, and when your body has determined that the meal you ate gave adequate levels of nutrition.
The trick is to eat nutrient-dense foods without much calories, like vegetables. I try to eat 50% of my food as vegetables, 40% as meat and fats, and the rest as other foods like fruit and nuts. I don’t have to run a mile to some obscure store to get the food I need. I do have an intense workout regime, but I could stay reasonably fit on 3 hours a week, which the typical fatty spends watching tv every day.

Healthy people aren’t obsessed with being healthy, fat people are obsessed with getting fat.

Categories: Fat People, Health, Idiots

How to Rate One’s Appearance

1 August 2011 9 comments

Sorry all, I got a little tied up the other night (quite literally I might add).  I believe Fat Slayer laid out enough details in his last post…

Unfortunately my time is still crunched this week, so all I have for you is a reference poster below and it is very useful indeed.  Ever had a girl ask you to rate her appearance, and after giving her a number, she asks you exactly what that number means?  In the future, just link her to this post.  Simply click the picture to view it in full size.