Home > Fat Apologists, Fat People, Idiots, Stories > Fat slayer has returned

Fat slayer has returned

What’s up lardos, did you miss me? Maybe not as much as your daily taco-bell run, but I know you fat fucks jerk off to my beautiful posts. Anyway, I’m back from living my life and being awesome, because that’s what if people actually do. We don’t spend our times sitting on the coutch watching football and eating pizza and nachos. We actually contribute to society, we make the world a better place. If America was ever attacked by China and we needed to defend our homeland, do you think you fat pieces of shit could even fit in a military uniform, much less manage to not eat your entire weekly rations by third breakfast? I bet not, and after the fit people fight to the death, the only ones left to reproduce (assuming we actually win seeing as over 1/3 of our country is too fat to function) are going to be you fat, pathetic slime. It enrages me just thinking about it. Anyway, I came back to tell you what I did last night, because I know you fatasses don’t actually go in public so you don’t actually experience anything interesting.

So I was at a club for about 20 minutes or so with 2 of my friends and we realized it was pretty much a ham-fest. One

The last thing lardbutt saw before she got KO’d

of my friends was dancing with a 8/10 (probably the hottest girl there) and we didn’t want to leave him since we all drove together, so we just went to the bar, took a couple shots, and talked to one another. Then some fucking hambeast and her two friends (one homo and one hambeast) walk up and she asked if they can buy us a drink. Although I have no respect for fatties, I might as well take their money so I accepted the offer. She was clearly a spoiled brat and was being very generous, trying to pound the drinks into us until we lowered our standards enough to fuck her. However, I can control myself, no matter how drunk I am a hambeast is always off limits.

Anyway, my friend came back from dancing with the 8/10 and said “fuck that bitch, let’s go” so we got up to leave. “Hey, wait!” the gluttonous slob cried. I turned around, stumbling, and replied “tha fuck do you want bitshhh?!” This made her angry, she clearly saw that she got played and that she wouldn’t be able to rape me in my incapacitated state tonight, and that enraged her. So she walked up to me, got right in my face, and started going on a rant. Spit was flying from her mouth, I don’t even remember what she said, all it sounded like to me was a chihuaha barking with its mouth full of mashed potatoes. After a few seconds I just turned around and started walking away, her odious appearance was not even worthy of being graced by my presence. After I got out the door I felt a tugging sensation on my back and I turned around and got immediately slapped in the face. The chubbster was standing in front of me with the most smug face that I’ve ever seen, and she just assaulted me. That was all the justification I needed. I immediately cocked my fist back and threw a fist-full of whoopass on her disgustingly chubby face, knocking her out in the process. Her friends stood in shock, probably having shit their pants along with the stupid bitch laying on the floor, and they didn’t dare do anything to help her.

I immediately went back to the car to get some hand sanitizer to wash off my knuckles, there’s no sense in allowing that putrid fat piece of shit to infect my beautiful hands with her repulsive bodily slime. All in all it was a great night. Although I didn’t bang any chicks, I got to beat the shit out of a fatster, so the night was even more successful than I thought. One day when the world wises up and realizes that fatties are a scourge on society, I’ll get paid to beat up these abominations. That will be the day…

  1. boomshaker
    15 August 2012 at 10:04 am

    YAY!

  2. No Fat Chicks
    19 September 2012 at 6:55 pm

    Reports say by 2030 over 50% of the US will be obese. Not just fat, but OBESE!

    When will these nihilist fucks learn? Treat them like pigs they get pissed, treat them with kid gloves they still get pissed, treat them as equals they get fatter!!!

  3. Moss
    6 November 2012 at 7:31 pm

    I find it hilarious how you’re clearly some ugly, scrawny, insecure fuck with no life so you come on here and create these lies about how attractive, muscular and confident you are to make yourself feel better. I think it’s very safe to assume that you dated a fat girl, (because no other girls would go near you) she broke your heart and now you have this completely unjustified hatred of all fat people. I doubt a fucking loser who spends the majority of his existence pathetically blogging about how fat people are supposedly the worst human beings in the world (worse than murderers, rapists, etc.) even HAS friends, let alone goes clubbing. And to preempt your reply, I’m not fat and never have been, sorry πŸ™‚

    • Jeffrey Lebowski
      12 March 2013 at 6:08 pm

      Keep telling yourself that, fatty. Everyone who hates you is just jealous and insecure. It’s not you, it’s everyone else that’s the problem! Shame you couldn’t pre-empt your obesity.

      • amonon
        13 July 2013 at 7:59 pm

        Interestingly enough, most “normal” people don’t share the extreme, pathological hatred of fat people displayed on this site. They may be slightly turned off on occasion, but they don’t talk stupid shit about “skin fluids” or “beating up fatsters”.
        That’s more typical for “criminal thugs”, and, you know, I’m not gonna go ahead and make up theories about some kind of “insecurities” beind the cause behind their nature – they’re considered to be the scum of society regardless.

        But yea, you’re the problem and not the “fat people” I’m afraid.

        • Say no to fat
          7 February 2014 at 10:20 pm

          Oh no don’t point the finger at the skinny people. You are the problem here. People, I’m sorry, FAT DISGUSTING THINGS like you are the problem. If you think it’s okay to be fat, then you are not normal. So stop acting like you know what normal people are like because you know damn well normal people don’t go near fat creatures like yourself. God your kind make me sick. Try a salad and a gym membership, get to a normal weight so that normal people will come somewhat close to you, then tell others what normal people are like. Until thin, shove your face with another cake and expedite your death. Thanks doll.

  4. Anon
    7 April 2013 at 7:12 pm

    Im not gonna take shots at you dude for writing this but there is quite the paradox in this story. The attractive 8/10 girl spurned your advances of a muscular, confident good looking guy as yourself and your friends. Yet the woman you saw you for more than just another guy at the club you “punched” in the face. Was that the same fist you used to beat your dick that night too? Sexual frustration is the number one cause of aggresion, domestic abuse, and self battery perhaps in this case you beat your dick like you beat her face. Think about this for a second: Had you not laid the lady you discriminated out on the ground she would have laid you out in her bedroom. Pussy is pussy, parking lot head is better than no head at all! And a strapping manly man out on the prowl such as yourself should know that. Man card revoked!!! Her gay friend might have been available if she wasn’t your type. You did leave drunk with a bunch of guys. I guess there’s much to be learned about intolerance. First rule is that it doesn’t get you laid or maybe it does. Even playtex inserts the douche into the douchebag. Sounds like penetration to me.

    Cheers!

  5. Elijah
    10 June 2013 at 6:16 am

    Pfft you faggot, talking about how she didn’t deserve to be blessed with being able to touch you. Who the fuck do you think you are? Douchebag Jesus? A fabled amazing skinny person? Well guess what, You know what? I’m skinny too, one of the blessed motherfuckers, and I feel like… equal to most other people out there… and I also feel like you’re a fucking faggot. Why don’t you get a life and learn how to respect chicks, how the fuck does that sound? I’ll bang a girl flat out, who cares. Hell I’ll even hit a girl if she comes at me with fists flying. But if I decided to be a little egotistic fuck, and use a girl (because apparently I am just so cool at the fake nightclub in my fake story) then absolutely screw her over, I think I would deserve a slap in the face too, for being a selfish ass. You’re little story here? It’s nothing but a pile of bullshit put together by some self centered little creep who is so cowardly that they will go find a hate website to blog on. And for all you other little commenters calling everyone fat because they disagree with you, you can fuck off. Learn some new comebacks, or at least grow up and try not commenting like you’re a five year old kid who is excited to use some big words.

    • Kay
      24 July 2014 at 2:38 am

      Haha! Too funny!

  6. amonon
    13 July 2013 at 8:04 pm

    Ahhh… so when you get paid for “beating up fatsters” you won’t look for justifications like them attacking you first anymore, right? This ain’t about moral retribution after all, is it πŸ˜€

    Look, I’m not saying that big woman wasn’t an asshole – and how she was. Unfortunately, you’re a hundred times worse πŸ˜€
    Sorry – normal, sane people out there don’t much care how fat you are if you attack and beat up innocent people; in fact, the “muscular alpha male” type may even get a higher dosis of hatred than some fat chick, but that’s just technicalities; point is, please don’t forget your ilk is the true scum of society and no one else.

    Thanks!

  7. amonon
    13 July 2013 at 8:52 pm

    Oh, and one thing – your dream of the gvt opening the hunt season on fat people will never, EVER come true. Not in 100 years, so don’t even think about it – it would be really healthier for you to let go of this delusion and focus on something a little more real.
    Some kind of shift of attitude from the reasonable “we should all be respectful to fat people cause they’re already facing so much crap from others” to the reasonable “they should be motivated and encouraged to lose weight, for their own benefit and society’s” is certainly possible – but paying you to beat up people, that would require a bit of a societal collapse at the very least. Maybe if that giant Vulcan breaks out?

    There’d be WAY too many hurdles to get over. First of all, and that’s the most important one – a lot of powerful poticians are fat (old white men). They’ll have you for lunch before, well, anything else really. Secondly, you would never get through with this “all fat people are going through the daily struggle of stuffing hamburgers into their mouths in order to keep the weight” bullshit – the educated world out there knows better, and they would be neither willing nor able to draw all those lines between:
    -fat people who do fit this description – struggling to get fat, moving their pinky to go back
    -fat people who don’t – easily getting weight, requiring real effort to get back and stay in shape
    -people with pathological causes for their obesity
    -people who do all the stupid things an average obese person does, but remains thin thanks to genetic and other factors more or less fitting the description of “luck”.

    Like, which fat ones can you beat up and which ones not? Why can you beat up that lazy fat guy, but not that lazy thin guy who has even worse discipline? How do you determine what their discipline is like without establishing a police state?

    Sorry – no way. Just forget about it. Just go outside, marvel at all those pretty creeks and flowers, and forget about it. It won’t happen.

  8. Nitroticus
    8 January 2014 at 3:13 pm

    Do you have open slots in your ranks? I’d like to be a part of the crusade. Fat juggaluggas, especially the morbidly obese chicks that think way too highly of themselves make me contemplate mass fatty-cide. Rawk on!

  9. Drune
    25 January 2014 at 9:04 pm

    You know what I find funny is that you actually believe people believe these stories you make up about your encounters with people in society. What says loser better than having to make up stories about what you do to fat people because you probably have no life if the direction of your actions is anything to go bye. Plus, if you really were as “awesome” as you claim why do you feel the need to impress people you don’t know with these lies. If you were that awesome you’d have no need to prove yourself oryour ideas therefore this blog wouldn’t exist. Whats funny is that you thiink hating fat people makes you more cool better when all it really does is show how much of a bitter ass you really are. I’m not defending those whoare obese, but I amattempting to protect those who might have fewer brain cells and aren’t able to see what a biggoted, selfish, chauvinistic, self-centred, hate monger you really are

  10. matt
    1 April 2014 at 4:54 pm

    I’m fat and proud I’m well on my way to becoming 500 lbs what’s wrong with being a little chubby and sitting on my ass all day Eating

    • fat hater
      29 April 2014 at 1:10 pm

      Well you are a disgusting ugly fat piggy. You should be put on a farm with all the pigs and farmed for your meat you big fat ugly smelly.disgusting waddling blob of fat

      • matt
        16 July 2014 at 9:45 am

        Hahahaha not really just thought I’d troll you to see what kind of retarded response I got guess you just proved me right BITCH

      • fattass
        17 July 2014 at 3:23 am

        Will I get fed lots of food on this farm so I can be an immobile fat pig then I’m on board

  11. Some person that fucking hates you
    5 November 2014 at 9:49 pm

    If you really think fat people are a scourge on society and inferior then you’re no better than hitler you faggot fuck. You & every sack of putrid shit like you deserves to fucking die. Hopefully the world comes to it’s senses and purges your shitty existence you worthless fuck. People like you make the world an already shittier place than it is. Congratulations on being a disgrace humanity.

  12. SkinnyBee
    18 December 2014 at 4:33 am

    haha awesome. I support anything this guy does and says. I am a fine healthy female and I delight in this blog.

    • Anonymous
      28 December 2014 at 5:04 pm

      Me too.

    • Emily
      23 December 2015 at 12:57 am

      As do I. That’s because we’re human sized. Look at all the fatties getting butt hurt. If they think this is bad, they should visit all the forums dedicated to hating their disgusting form. One forum in particular has over 100k members. Purple are getting sick of the FA and HAES mentality of “look at these dumb self love selfies! Tell me I’m attractive! Lower your standards society, I don’t want to work out or take care of myself but I want attention from the opposite sex! Fat is beautiful, teehee.” Don’t like what he is saying? Lose weight and take care of yourself, nobody wants to roll you in flour to find your wet spot and not being able to wipe your ass isn’t “cute”. Go back to your safe spaces on Tumblr.

      • onepissedoffjew
        31 July 2016 at 6:38 am

        How much cum do you drink on a daily basis?

      • Julonde Vern
        7 September 2016 at 4:05 am

        Excuse me, but I find myself quite comfortable in my skin. Unlike you, I refuse to let mainstream media fill my head with a bunch of backwards ass bullshit about what is beautiful and what isn’t. Yeah, I am a proud 320lb beauty, which, believe me, beats the hell out of looking like an anorexic Miley Cyrus any day. I bet you would also be interested to know that I am a mother of 3, happily married for 20 years, and I make more money in a week than you probably made your entire life. The only thing you’ll ever be good at in life is spreading your legs, mouth and asscheeks. Face it slut, you’re the inferior one here. Have a nice life, skank. P.S. try not to piss through your food stamps in a week, k?

  13. Awakepeoplenow
    20 December 2015 at 7:33 am

    You stupid! That was hilarious!!!

  14. Anonymous
    10 February 2016 at 8:47 am

    So you hit women? I don’t care if they are morbidly obese. You don’t hit women. I know know you are a complete pussy. Come fight me. I’m 6ft4in 225lb 10 percent body fat. You’ll finally see some real muscle you can drool over and get an ass beating you women beating piece of shit. I have only ever heard of scrawny insecure guys hitting women. Post a picture of yourself and your routine. I door see any puctures of you here. and don’t be a bitch and Pic one of the naked men you drool over wishing you’d look like puss.

  15. Maria
    12 February 2016 at 10:59 pm

    Just because you see fat people everywhere does not mean they are stuffing their face with unhealty food, most could be trying to lose weight. You should know that a fat person cannot lose over night! You said you would kill a person because they are overweight, you would end up in prison! It would the last time you meet a beautiful woman, because i’m sure there would be some big men who would love to have you all to themselves! Haha

  16. Maria
    12 February 2016 at 11:00 pm

    Just because you see fat people everywhere does not mean they are stuffing their face with unhealthy food, most could be trying to lose weight. You should know that a fat person cannot lose over night! You said you would kill a person because they are overweight, you would end up in prison! It would the last time you meet a beautiful woman, because i’m sure there would be some big men who would love to have you all to themselves! Haha

  17. Martin
    4 May 2016 at 9:09 am

    Dude I’m rather turned off by fat people and I don’t believe in “fat acceptance” but who the hell punches a women in the face? It’s even worse that u would then boast about it. It’s also a bit concerning the great detail in which you state how u would murder a fat person! The nazis deemed people as “sub-human” and doing so allowed them to commit horrific crimes against humanity. Acceptance is one thing, physically harming a person because u don’t like the way they look or live is entirely another. You really need to figure out what is triggering all of this anger and realize that in your posts you have admitted to committing a crime – assault. Your blog would could be submitted as evidence. I guarantee a judge would come down extra hard on you for what u have written. You have a decent argument don’t make it absurd with crazy.

  18. onepissedoffjew
    31 July 2016 at 6:33 am

    You’re such a beg mate. I bet all these “hot girls” are just fag slang for smoking hot black guys with 17 inch cocks that you wish you could fit in your little faggot cherry rose bud arsehole. Lemme guess: daddy touched your bum at a young age, no?

  19. Lard slayer
    1 August 2016 at 12:12 pm

    All u fat fucks and fat fuck lovers make me sick, this was a good storey and I can only prey that some day the government does make it open season on fat asses. Not to kill but maybe just get rewarded for every pair of obese hands. Maybe you fat fucks will be sweet if you have no arms to pick up burgers with and every time you need to eat you have to bend down and just use your mouth to pick up food off the floor like the animals you are, maybe then you will slowly form into normal humans again you will still be more productive without arms then being fat fucks with arms.

    • RedFred
      7 September 2016 at 3:49 am

      Go fuck yourself bitch! Your just a scrawny fag who jacks your 1 cm dick to gay mlp furry porn.

  20. Lard Slayer
    10 September 2016 at 1:46 am

    It’s fun being thin, I’m so flexible I’m able to fit my own cock into my ass, and it feels so fucking good. Being thin and a fag is life.

  21. ConqueringLardasses
    15 March 2017 at 1:07 pm

    UGGHH! Fucking hate crisco-filled fat pieces of shit. I’m so fucking ripped my dick has a workout routine. Fat people need to jump into the sea, one by one. But then again, the whale population would skyrocket. Let’s just burn them all.

  22. Conquering Lardasses
    15 March 2017 at 1:08 pm

    UGGHH! Fucking hate crisco-filled fat pieces of shit. I’m so fucking ripped my dick has a workout routine. Fat people need to jump into the sea, one by one. But then again, the whale population would skyrocket. Let’s just burn them all.

    • Oliver Prudley
      1 April 2017 at 5:05 pm

      I second that.

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